Open Response to Cease and Desist Letter From Themirkinfringe.com

June 5, 2010

Dear Sirs:

We are as of Wednesday the second of June in receipt of your letter, wherein you claim that we knowingly, through the medium of our website (which it’s probably worth mentioning has nothing-nothing-in common with your website), attempted to divert your web traffic for profit, and wherein you further demand that we cease and desist as a web entity within thirty days of receipt of said letter.

Let us first say that we were not in any way aware of the existence of your website, the self-proclaimed (we can’t imagine how your claims could be validated) Largest Online Retailer of Natural and Man-Made Fiber Pubic Wigs. There is therefore no possible way we could have had an interest in diverting your market share. Let us further say that upon investigating your website, we are still utterly devoid of interest in diverting your customer base towards our site.

Further, even were we desirous of diverting your clientele (which we really can’t stress enough that we aren’t), we could have no financial interest in doing so. We literally have jack shit in terms of merchandise or services for sale on our site. We are a humble website whose sole intent is to amuse on a pro bono basis.

All that said, and while we have no intention of ceasing or desisting with our humble web presence, we would like to make you this offer instead: please charge to the attached credit card number (Expiration date 02/11, CV 432) two “Cleopatra Jones” models, one “Beach Bunny Blowout,” and a “Christie Canyon.”

Yours in Commerce and Friendship,

TMF

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