The Pros of Above Ground Pools

December 31, 2009

  • Above ground ladder
  • No deep end/shallow end tension
  • More phallic than a traditional, hole-in-the-ground pool
  • Repels obnoxious divers
  • What you see is what you get, as opposed to mysterious, subterranean pools that could go down for God knows how far
  • They’re a “big deal” in the Dakotas
  • Perfect for aquatic “trust falls”
  • Like a huge fucking hot tub, but with cooler water and no jets
  • No skimmers, which as everybody knows, tend to trap little birds behind their sinister one-way flaps

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